A House Painter’s Tale

Last year, my boss offered me the chance to make some extra money. Knowing that I love to paint, he asked if I would paint something for him.

A house.

He’d bought it as a rental, and wanted to sell it, so it needed a little sprucing.

Ooh, a way to let off some creative energy? No, but money would be nice.

So, I took him up on it.  I would get paid by the hour to paint every wall in the place, all white and pristine.

…Did you know that when someone has painted their walls dark navy blue, it takes about 4 coats to cover it?

…Did you know that when paint gets on the carpet, it’s pretty darn hard to get off?

…Did you know that you have to spackle every little hole made by every little nail before you can paint?

…Did you know that painting an entire house is a huge pain in the ass?

Well I found out all of that, and more!  I got painter’s elbow, a sore back, paint on all of my clothes, the smell of primer that wouldn’t go away, etc etc and on and on.

Also, every time I went back to the house to paint more, I saw spots where I’d have to paint another coat or two.

It took me about a month, but I finished that whole house by myself in my spare time.  I was pretty darn proud of myself, and reallyreally glad to be finished.

My boss was happy, I had some extra money, and now his house was ready to sell.

I ran into him a few months ago, and asked him about it.  “So, did you sell that house okay, like you wanted to?”

“Oh!” he said, turning red. “Well, not exactly.”

“Why? What happened?” I asked.

“Well, actually we decided just to tear it down because the property was worth more that way.”

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